Sunday, March 6, 2011

At the point of return.

For a long time, I wasn't sure I was going to be able to move on from my 'previous life' and 'previous' friends. I thought that that was my world and nothing would be the same without it/them. And finally, I have come to realize that it is true, what we always tell others, the sun rise again and things do get better. Just with time. I had to weave my way through lies and deceit to find truth and meaning and I believe I have finally found the group of people to compliment my life and me most wonderfully. Now I am able to focus on positive things, things to look forward to and enjoy. And now, I'm able to do that with the support and understanding of others. I feel like I have found a sense of hope and possibility that I never had before. My life was filled with a lot of uncertainty and doubt, which of course, makes its way into my life still, but now its not consuming me like before. I've stood up for who I am and who I want to be and how I want to be treated. Though, I still worry about how others think, I feel like I've been able to let go of some of my paranoia, which is a huge relief.

And what a better time is there for this point of return to happen than on my 18th birthday.Well, 'by' my birthday would be more accurate. Either way, I am very grateful for being able to move forward, with a bright outlook and future to look toward, and path to follow. My birthday has been (well technically, was, considering it's the 6th now) very simple, but yet very satisfying and enjoyable. I am very pleased with out the day turned out and with whom I spent it. My friends pleasantly surprised me and made the day very special. I can't explain it very well, but I feel connected with them, something I've missed for a while. Old connections have been reignited and new ones are being made. There is still an uncanny bond I feel with one of my friends. I don't quite know how to explain it, but it haunts me in a way. I just wonder if I'm the only one that notices it. I've never felt as comfortable talking and being with a person alone as I do with him.

I am hoping for even more wonderful days such as this in my future. I just hope I can spend them with these people. With him. I hope I can continue to personally evolve positively, throughout the rest of this year and ultimately end it with happy memories and maybe a few wishes come true.

1 comment:

  1. The time stamp on my blog is messed up. It was 1:13 a.m. on March 6, 2011 when I completed and posted this blog post.

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