Not sure.

I feel entirely uncertain about everything in my life right now. I'm accepting of the fact that things, life, people are uncertain--the future is uncertain--but feeling that way is a whole other rough terrain in which to be. I'm not sure of myself, which really isn't anything new. Not only that though, but my relationships with my friends and family are a variety of uncertain right now. My job seems potentially uncertain considering how often I've been screwing up lately. This production is certainly uncertain and I've never felt more uncomfortable in my life.

The combination of everything is sinking me into a funk or maybe even depression and I don't know how to deal with anything and I almost don't want to. I'm so emotionally drained that trying to fix things and find a solution/resolution is just exhausting and not worth the effort, seemingly.

Sadly, sometimes, I just think about if something truly did go horribly wrong and I was forced to deal with that that maybe then, at least, I would have a legitimate reason to feel so miserable all the time.

All I want right now is to relax and create and to give my body and mind a chance to breathe. Unfortunately though, I still have to survive the next two weeks, which seem like an eternity for sure.